Iran Lawrence Abstract Fine Art  

Mastering the art of Wellbeing


Art of True Romance

By: Iran Lawrence

We all love the sun, but we also know that it can burn. We want love and romance, but baffled when we become disillusioned. So what is the secret and where is the missing link?

While some people may disagree, actually life itself is a form of art; thus similar rules apply to both. When we look at a piece of art, the first thing that strikes our senses is the dominating color. Then we become aware of the style of the art itself and the third and last is the execution and the technical expertise in creating it. But regardless of the last two criteria, the first instantaneous impression of the art has a dominating effect on our senses, which effects the degree of joy and pleasure we feel towards the art and the purchasing decisions we make.

In our relationships, generally our instantaneous reaction to a potential partner is also through the eyes by noticing the physical appearance; and very secondary to this is the nonphysical attributes such as personality, achievements, material possessions, etc. The stronger our reaction is toward the physical and material attributes, the stronger is that imagined cliché: "love at first sight!" Before we get to know the person hardly any at all, we quickly begin to "create" an "interpretation" of him/her in our imagination along with assignment of all sorts of values and expectations and willingness to do a number of "sacrifices" in order to have and keep what we "believe" to be the ONE in the name of LOVE and ROMANCE.

Love in this context is very much blended with lust and physical attributes and gratifications - a superficial duality with hate that can quickly change place without warning, leading to pain, sorrow and bitterness. But here is the magic pill. The actual anatomy of a lasting "true love" is sympathy (relating harmoniously to someone else) and admiration. No matter who we are, first and foremost we need to explore and fully understand ourselves before looking to enhance and complement our lives through a compatible partnership with someone else. In the absence of fully understanding ourselves, we are dealing with a hidden confusion within as to who we are, what we want and where we are heading in terms of our goals and aspirations, while hoping to find the ONE that is going to make us happy and complete. And in some cases we are looking for that “perfect partner” that is going to make up for all the past mistakes we have made.

But most importantly, we must explore and think about who we are and what we genuinely admire in ourselves that can be compatible attributes to share with someone else. When we are very well aware that the best quality admiration is the one we give ourselves, it is only through that level of clarity and refinement that we can honestly notice and admire the intellectual and spiritual attributes of others and discover what true compatibility consists of.

When we discover and feel a draw of "sympathy and admiration" toward another being, through a patient, intelligent and objective exploration, free of physical temptations, it is only then that we can become blessed by the miracles of a fulfilling relationship; constantly engaged in creating vitality within a higher realm of consciousness, where the intellectual and spiritual essence of the relationship becomes the pivotal and the lasting source of love, strength and fulfillment.

 


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